The personality is referred to in some material as the Scribes and the Pharisees – that they were intent upon having the favorable attention of man, of gaining their approval for their pious behavior and of believing and doing as they were told by authority – “The Law”. And of course the “A” side of that situation, the one that wants to complain to get its way, stick up for its rights and blame was called Gentiles. But all of it makes up the personality and there is two aspects of it, and it’s at war with each other. There is an enemy within to the enemy within. Now I neither identifies with the Scribes or the Pharisees or the Gentiles. It renounces them both. It dis-identifies from ‘em and reports merely what is going on in that thing called “personality” – it is now serving X, which is its nature. It is the Awareness Function of X and it is being obedient to its nature – to be supplying accurate information to X as to what’s going on.

Now the house has been taken over by usurpers and the first chore of I is to observe the usurpers, report them to X, and X will take care of renderin’ ‘em inoperative or removing ‘em or whatever it does.  However one will notice that when once or twice, when something is really observed and reported to X, that one doesn’t see that particular not-I again. Another one will take over and be quite as effective in its effort to serve Mammon, but they will be diminishing – every one, one observes.

Now, before one takes up this dis-identifying, which seems like something strange (it’s something different than anything we’ve ever done) the first thing one does, of course, is to question the purpose of living. As long as we accept, take for granted that the purpose of living is to gain pleasure and escape pain on all levels – having attention, having approval, having a sense of importance, being able to control and manipulate other people by whatever means we use… and to avoid being ignored or rejected (or at least find an excellent justification that says they were pretty stupid if they did that), always avoid disapproval (or if not, justify that the person that did the disapproving was picking on me, not seeing clearly, etc.) and the sense of inferiority. As long as these are identified with, I is hypnotized, is serving Mammon because all of ‘em are an effort to keep that. No matter what goes on, it is serving Mammon. So, dis-identifying is to renounce, deny as being I, the self. It is to dispose of it and see it as an object. 

Now as long as we have as the purpose of living is to be non-disturbed (that of Mammon) we are dependent upon everything that offers it, regardless of whether it be Communism, whether it be some other ideology, whether it be a person that I gain some pleasure from. And if “I” am dependent upon that pleasure then “I” am dependent on the person; then “I” must guard and watch and “I” will feel jealous if they give any attention to anyone else. “I” will be fearful least “I” lose that source of pleasant attention and there is very apt to be violence. The inner man is in a state of violence as long as I is hypnotized by the not-I’s and it is asleep.

As I stands aside and is the observer, dis-identifies, denies the self, renounces the self and begins to report to X what’s going on in that self, what is happening in that house that was really rightfully it but now is pushed out because they have taken over… then one is reporting to X and is obedient to one’s nature. And that is the greatest obedience there is. And without obedience to one’s nature, one is identified and being disobedient to one’s nature because one is serving Mammon and one is dependent upon every suggestion that offers pleasure and comfort or threatens pain.

Now the things that one renounces, of course, is called “riches…possessions”. Now, let’s talk about not the house and the car and the property and the bank account which all the self does possess and we will leave it possessing those things. But let’s observe that it possesses opinions of which it prizes highly and considers that, “ “My” opinions are always correct and that other people’s are always wrong and that “I” must defend these opinions.” And you have probably observed a considerable amount of violence reported to X – a great emergency and X prepared tremendous amounts of energy to defend a mere opinion (that may or may not have any validity whatsoever and no way of checking it out.) 

One’s ideas that one has accumulated here and there are great possessions, great riches to the conditioned self. And so we observe:  I observes John defending opinions, claiming opinions, claiming ideas as his. And he frequently says somebody stole his ideas because somebody else is doin’ somethin’ similar. And he feels very mistreated and he sticks up for his right to have sole possession, or at least the credit or honor for that idea. He also claims thoughts. 

So, John says “my” thoughts. I observe John claimin’ thoughts and I can observe John’s thoughts.  I may not be able to observe anyone else’s. But I can observe John’s thoughts because I am assigned to observe this earthling, this self and I observe those thoughts. I see that “A” puts up a thought, and then “B” puts up a counter act and this is called “thinking.” And basically they’re set off by associations, which is pushing a button. So John had his face pushed in the Bermuda grass and beat up by a neighbor kid when he was five years old.  Today he is allergic to Bermuda grass because ever’ time he goes by the Bermuda, he is about to be reminded of that kid that pushed him in the grass. He has a big account against the kid. And, so he begins to cry and sneeze and feel mistreated. And it’s said that he is “allergic to Bermuda grass.”

To observe thoughts is most interesting because they’re set off by association. And when it sets off one in “A’s” association, “B” gets one that counteracts it. And the person says, “I’m going to do this” from “A”; and then “B” sits up and says, “Yes, but this might happen if you do that!” And then begins “A” to set up another idea as to what it would have another thought.  Then “B” says, “Yes, but…” Or “B” originates an idea that we will do a lot of good and gain a lot of attention by giving $1000 to the Boy Scouts. But “A” says, “Yes, but if you do that we can’t get the boat and we do want the boat.” And “B” says, “Yes, but if we get the boat we won’t be able to give the $1000 and somebody might say that we were just showin’ off.”  And “A” says, “But it won’t be showin’ off. It will be providing something for the family to enjoy.  And I’m getting it all for the family.” And we can listen to the justifications. 

So I will observe thoughts – the thoughts of “A”, the thoughts of “B” and the resultant contention going on between until one can overpower the other and talk in the name of I to report to X. But now when I is observing this going on, their story is intercepted by I.  I is now the mediator between self and X. Before, I was hypnotized and the self was speaking in the name of I directly to X. Now I is on the job and is the mediator. And it screens all the material that the self is ramblin’ around with. So there begins to be an entirely different state of affairs.  No longer can the self report directly to X because I has awakened from its hypnotic sleep and arose from among the dead ideas and is now reporting what is going on in the self. It reports what I has is a treasure and where I’s attention continually is – the false “I.” The false “I”, the self’s attention is all on the treasure of the Four Dual Basic Urges. It holds this out as the great treasure and it continually attempts to gain it. It uses every contention to both “A” and “B” to get it. 

And the self is ever involved in war and it never gains the non-disturbed state; it’s always a little held out in the future. But as one I, the real observer, begins to observe this, one realizes that the Four Dual Basic Urges are a fallacy. It is an illusion and that the struggle towards that illusion is the disintegrating factor that has brought man to a disintegrated state from fighting jungle wars to each other, to hating each other, to contending constantly and that within, there is the battle going on between “A” and “B.” This outward world is merely an outward expression in society of each individual’s inner state. One sees that one is (while identified with the not-I’s) is bringing about all the things that the not-I’s say they don’t want. They want pleasure and comfort but they’re doing everything possible to bring about dissension. They want attention and they do everything possible to have one ignored. 

So, as one observes this one has a complete change in values. But we will not start to work on the values yet. I is merely observing the action of the self, all the many not-I’s, all the bits of conditioning. One is observing personality. As one observes this, this personality becomes rather passive. It is as an object being observed. It is a thing that is being observed much as one would look through a microscope and observe bacteria on a slide. It is purely an object or a thing. Now this is the beginning of awareness of self. The beginning of self-awareness is the beginning of Objective Awareness. Now all of our days we have been subject to whatever went on. We saw it as self – “I” was the subject. “And how did this affect me? How did this affect?” 

Now as I observe the not-I’s, I observe John, I will observe him building accounts against Mary and against ever’ other person he meets. He will be building accounts against the government.  He will be building accounts against someone that he hears speak out in public that is opposed to his ideas that he feels in some way is a threat to him. He will see him… I will observe John indulging in self-pity because of something that happened long ago and because he was mistreated today. Somebody failed to give attention to John. Somebody failed to give approval when he felt he was entitled to it. He put on a good act; he was a Scribe or a Pharisee and nobody really gave him any great praise for it. He’s horribly disappointed. 

Mary, I observe Mary (when I’m the lady), I observe Mary being very upset because no one noticed her new dress. Now I doesn’t own a dress. And I doesn’t own Mary. I is observing Mary. But Mary owns a dress and Mary has a new dress and it’s very lovely accordin’ to Mary (and possibly to everbody else) but, “Nobody noticed it and nobody gave her a compliment and nobody gave her any approval or attention and she’s very upset.” Now all this does not get to X anymore because I is observing this. Mary takes care of the children (“her” children, if you please) and I observes Mary feeling that the children are obligated to her because she fed them and clothed them today and she washed their clothes and they should be obligated to her and do what she wants ‘em to, when she wants ‘em to. And we might, I might observe Mary making the children feel guilty. It is an excellent means of controlling. And if she doesn’t control, she feels inferior. If she controls, she feels pretty good – she is powerful now, she is important. The children look up to her and feel obligated to her. I observe Mary making John feel obligated because she cooked a good dinner or because she cleaned the house up very well. And if John doesn’t notice these things, woe be to John. 

So, I observes the play going on in the bits of conditioning. It is as though one were above a house and looking down into a house that had no roof or a transparent roof and could see all the things going on in that house. Maybe some kids are in the bathroom makin’ a mess and Mother’s in the kitchen, cookin’, and another one is trying to gain some approval somewheres by painting a picture or by doing a piece of work or whatever it may be. One I is observing a house full of not-I’s, which about half of ‘em are opposed and trying to undo the intentions of the other half. One half is serving Mammon by complainin’, stickin’ up for rights and blaming; the other half is trying to serve Mammon by trying to please everbody, by believing and doing as they are told by authority. And they quote books and say, “You know this is what you should do and this is the necessity and this is absolutely necessary!” And they try to please Mammon, gain Mammon, serve Mammon by appearing to be different. And there is a war going on. 

This is called conflict. It is called struggle. It is called resistance. I observe these and does not try to stop them, but is merely observing and reporting to X of what’s going on in this house. This group of not-I’s really make up two nations, the Gentile and the Jews. The Jews live by the law: please everbody, believe and do as you’re told by authority, and appear to be different. The Gentile says, “Hang all that! It’s important to have my way right now and the way to get it is to complain. So I will put on a demonstration in the streets. I will put on a protest meeting (which is a form of complainin’). I will stick up for my rights to do as I want to by any conceivable sort of violence that may arise. I will be sure and describe what’s to blame.”

So we’re really observing peoples as well as observing not-I’s, because they really are people.